So I have finished watching the second episode of ANTM 9, which is the episode where they kick the first girl out, so technically it's the first episode. And I must admit, ANTM is seriously getting better and better! Thank you, Tyra! Oh what would we do without you and your amazing show! So anyway, I'll do a little recap of what happened.
So the 13 lucky bitches meet Jay Manuel who introduces them to their new mode of transport, which is like a mini-bus run by 100% bio-diesel. And Jay Manuel explains that Tyra is really concerned with the environment so Top Model is going green! So the insides of the mini-bus is pimped out with all things recyclable, like grass for example. And one of the girls said that the seats look like recycled tires. Wow! So we can add 'environmentalist' to Tyra's ever-expanding resume!
Tyra Banks: Supermodel, Actress, Reality-Show Host, Singer, Talk-Show Host, Counselor, Humanitarian, Environmentalist.
She's like a modern version of Mother Theresa who teaches young girls everywhere how to tuck your bootee out but make it fashion.
Oh Tyra! Naomi Campbell is seething with jealousy at your remarkable beauty!So on with the show! They are brought to their new house which is practically decorated with plants. They might get dengue! For their first photoshoot, I seriously thought that they would have to like, pose as pollutants and the effects of pollution or something! Like, I imagined a girl posing as an oil-covered seagull on the beach and another would pose as acid-rain or something. But actually their photoshoot was about smoking and the consequences of it. So the picture involves the girl being glamorous in front of the mirror smoking and then they go re-do their make-up so that they can pose as the mirror-image which portrays all the things that actually happen to you. It's kind of cool and practically all the girls did really well! Oh and during panel, Tyra announced that since young girls everywhere are watching, the girls will be acting as role models, so she banned smoking. I think she just wants drama.
SPOILER ALERT
So there were a few sub-plots that happened. One was a Bianca vs. Lisa catfight which really came out of nowhere. Ok, so Lisa is an exotic dancer but she's not a stripper!!! She has a top on, a bikini. She keeps saying that which makes me wonder if she wears bottoms! During castings, Bianca thinks that she's the fun bitch. So at first, I thought that Bianca was supposed to be the good person and Lisa the villain, but it was the other way around. When they were being made up, Bianca kept on taunting Lisa and asking her if she's going to do well and stuff. And Lisa's like, whatever bitch. Bianca interviews that she thinks Lisa isn't her competition because she's a stripper, and the winner can't be a stripper. Then why do you keep friggin messing with her! Ugh! Bianca's just jealous. So Bianca goes first and sucks. She tells Lisa that she did well just to intimidate her. Lisa does amazing! Seriously! Then when the girls were hanging out, Bianca verbally attacks Lisa about the whole stripper thing and Lisa was cursing at Bianca and they had to have other girls stand as a barrier. Then back at home, Lisa apologized to Bianca and Bianca also said sorry. She interviews that she only said sorry because she didn't want it to come around to panel and Tyra. Umm... she's watching the interviews you stupid ho! Oh and next week, it's Bianca vs. Saleisha.
Oh and there's also this girl called Heather. She's the pale looking one. She looks and sounds like C4's Michelle. And she has a mild form of autism called Asperger's Syndrome, which makes her awkward during social situations. It's not like as if she runs around crazily trying to overturn all the dustbins, it's just that she doesn't really talk to the other girls, which makes me really sad for her. So some of the girls, especially Kimberly, bitches about how creepy she is and stuff. They say that her face is gorgeous but then with the disability, she can't be a model, which is totally true but you obviously have to keep it to yourself or you'll look like an asshole. And when Heather called her mother, her mother told her to be nice to the other girls. Mom, it's the other way around!
Then there's another storyline. It's called "Tyra hates Victoria". So Victoria (one of my favourites) is a Yale student. During panel, she was nervous and quiet, and Twiggy tells her that she needs to get over her insecurity, but Victoria interjects politely and says that she's not insecure, she's just quiet. And Tyra just pounds her like the jackal she is and says that she needs to be nicer! Gosh! Tyra hates people who are smarter than she is. And when Nigel says that Victoria's photo is the best of the bunch, Tyra's all "Victoria's photo sucks! I don't see the je ne sais quoi!" Ugh! Shut up and stop being so biased!
And I love this season because I practically have 8 favourites! Yay! So here's the girls from most favourite to least favourite!
VICTORIA
Totally love her photo! And she looks like Shandi for some reason! Yay! And she was really nice too. When the girls were bitching about Heather, she interviews that she hates the girls who bitch about them!LISA
In the promotional photograph, she looks so dowdy, but OMG she's so pretty!!! I LOVE HER and don't care if she's a stripper. She kind of looks like Alicia Keys.SALEISHA
She went to Tyra's T-Zone camp and has the self-esteem of Tyra Banks! Congrats to her! And she looks like Tyra in her "after" shot! Hahaha!HEATHER
She's so endearing! During castings, she said, "Hey pretty lady, and Tyra." Hahaha! And Tyra's like, "That's Ok! Autism results to poor vision, right?" No, autism results to blunt realistic comments, Tyra. And she has her stuffed monkey which is kind of cute. I like her, but I hope Tyra eliminates her before the go-see episode. You know Tyra's going to eliminate her during the go-see episode.JANET
I don't really know if she looks like a 12-year-old boy or not. Well, she has the body of a man. But she seems nice and not bitchy at all.JENAH
She reminds me of the Fairly OddParents for some bizarre reason. And she's the only known smoker. She looked shocked when Tyra announced the banning of cigarettes. You know she's going to smoke in the bathroom!CHANTAL
She seems kind of meh. But I like her.SARAH
She seems pretty, but she's too thin to be plus-size and too fat to be skinny.AMBREAL
They call this fierce?! I don't know! Not my fav to win!MILA
She got eliminated. Thank God! She says that she's a happy person and celebrates everything from birthdays to new nail colours! Go and celebrate your departure then. And she finds crying a waste of time. She didn't cry. You just want to punch her. And she finds her chemotherapy hair funny and calls it bozo clowny. What an idiot!EBONY
She's like Eva. Bitchy at castings. Tyra the psychiatrist breaks down Ebony because she's been walked over all her life so she becomes quiet and shy. Still hate her.KIMBERLY
Looks like the girl from Little Miss Sunshine. Ha! She sucks! She bitched about Heather.BIANCA
Ugh! Hate her! She doesn't seem to have that thing people have in the middle of their upper lip, you know?