My Sunburn

Ahh!! My stupid sunburn is starting to kick in. My neck, my back, my arms, everywhere!

My brother gave me $20 for no random reason. Hoorah!

Watched Cayote Ugly yesterday and Tyra Banks was in it. That movie really made me cry. Well, I didn't really cry but it was sad. Boohoo.

I'm suddenly in love with Newspaper Cutting. Anybody lazy to do it? I could do yours for free. Seriously, all I have to do is write crap. And trust me, I'm really good at crap talking or writing.

School starts tomorrow. Boo!

My Motorcycle Ride

Went to the beach today. It's been a long time since I went there. Went with all my relatives from my mother's side. Everyone there was either Malay, Indian or Caucasian. Seriously. Now I'm like, 100 shades darker than my normal skin tone. When we wanted to go home, my uncle asked me to 'tompang' his motorcycle so that he could just send me. I haven't ridden a motorcycle before. Like, never!

It was really weird you know. Because when my uncle's motor turned, I thought that I would fall or something. Reached home. Slept for a while. It's so tiring you know. Bye.

My Cousin's Mohawk

Forgot to wish everyone Happy Chinese New Year. Even my brother was singing the Gong Xi Ni Ah song which was totally freaky. Laminated every single one of my pictures, which took like, an hour because there were air bubbles. I won an all-expense paid trip to my auntie's house via Confort Taxis sponsored by my brother because he was too lazy to take the bus. Kind of weird that it's Chinese New Year. I saw families at the bus-stops who look like as if they're going to the beach.

Reached there. Found my cousin doing the same thing as me! What an utter coincedence! Except that she's decorating her Music file. I think she has a music teacher that's kind of like Ms Neo. I would never decorate my Music file. Never. She printed out pictures of Mary-Kate and Ashley and Hilary Duff and Lindsay Lohan etc. She also printed out a picture of Naima in the 1800-FLOWERS photoshoot. Then, she was like, "I like this hairstyle. It's hot. I want it." Freak. But then she showed me this video of this man who was turned into a stingray because his mother 'sumpah' him into a stingray. And it's such a freaky video. The stingray had a face of a man and it's huge. Thanks to Bluetooth, I can show it to my friends at school. So, if you want to be freaked out, TAG!

I also have this picture of a ghost. I think I have shown it to my classmates like, two years ago. But I can't seem to find it. It had a picture of me and my family with this religious teacher in a mosque and we all sat under a window at night. When the photo was developed, there was like, this white figure in the reflection and it had a long narrow face and there were eyes, a nose, etc. and it was wearing a scarf. I think it's a Muslim spirit. Freaky right? Sigh. If only I could find it. My room is always in a mess. Like, I still have Pokemon Trading Card booster pack plastic wrappers inside this compartment which I have never opened in decades. I bet the plastic has decomposed already.

Ahhh!! My brother's stupid Mariah Carey CD has made me in love with her. I like her voice. I hate her image. I think she's as old as Madonna, who's older than my mother.

My Curry-Flavoured Pudding

I think I'm the only one in the world who has told the truth by saying that he ate curry-flavoured pudding. Seriously, it just tastes curry-ish and cold. Well, my mother left food in the fridge because she thinks I can't cook. So, when I wanted to eat, I took the curry out and everything was like, semi-solid. Which is like, eww... I'm supposed to heat it up, but I stupidly tried a bit of it and it was mainly fats because the fats floated on the top. Silly me.

Hey guess what?! I can like, manually laminate paper. Isn't that cool? I have like, this kind of sticky plastic from Australia which I have never used in like, about 5 years. And you just peel the plastic from the paper thingy and you paste it. Yay, now nobody can tear my paper!

My Emancipation

Double post because I'm going to go out tomorrow the whole day. So I'm going to prepone (opposite of postpone) my entry for tomorrow to today.

Guess what?! Popular was closed and it was only 1pm. Like, I went to White Sands all the way to the 5th floor and what do I see? Stupid metal gate coated by aluminium oxide. Then, there was like, this letter which said something like this:

Dear Valued Customer. Us Popular people are really lazy to attend to you. Why the hell did you come to our shop on Chinese New Year Eve, you gundu. You're a stupid, stupid bitch. Why couldn't you come yesterday, or something?! We have other important things to do than to smile at your dumb face all day long, OK?! So why don't you go to another bookstore and buy what you need to buy. Freak!

It was something like that. I dunno, the tears in my eyes affected my vision. Seriously, I thought that it was the end of the world, so I tried to be happy by buying food at Mac. There's this sausage stand in the shopping centre and they sell delicious sausages! It's like, better than those frozen sausages. Yumm!

Went home and tried to fix my file the whole day. After like, 2 hours of like, physically abusing my file, I did it. It's just that you had to put down the lever first, but I left it up. Silly me. My brother went out jumping from building to building and I mean that literally. I mean, he keeps videos of himself falling flat on your stomach from like 5 feet platforms. I think he enjoys self-mutilation or something. I could show it to you, if only there was Videobucket.

Decorated my file with pictures of ANTM except that they're modified like those I-Pod ads, except that the people are all white and the background is all green (to match my file). The collage is going to be called 'Green with envy' or 'Green with envy?'. Hee. I wrapped the file with a nicer kind of green because the original colour was dubbed 'toilet green'. Like the colour of tiles in some toilets.

My aunties are like, calling every single hour to check if I'm still alive. It's like irritating. I had to lie that my brother had some project going on. I'm still alone now. I mean, I just feel like calling him and nagging at him until he comes home. It's so scary being alone in the middle of the night. I mean, scary. I think my house is like, you know, haunted. Not like as if I see ghosts every few seconds, but I always feel a presence in the kitchen. I was even startled by my own shadow. I even switch on the television even when I'm not watching because it's like, so quiet. I can hear crickets. My parents haven't SMSed me. But they have SMSed my auntie. Which is like, so sad! I think that the message wasn't delivered because my phone sucks. I'm going to get another phone soon, like in a month. I'm going to sue Motorola for wasting like, a day of my life, just from charging alone.

I'm suddenly so scared of Morning Digest. I'm scared I might trip over a Student Counsellor or something. And I'm scared I might say "Mrs Ou-Yang" instead of "Mrs Ong".

My brother just SMSed me and said that he'll be home late and told me not to close the latch thingy at the door. Wat?! Mee du knot unndersttan Ingris. Soli. Mee haf two klose da latch.

Yay! I keep looking at my SS file and it's nice. I'm so happy.

My Stupidity

Hey! Guess what people?! I did the most stupidest thing ever! Like, beyond comprehension!

Ok, yesterday, Ms Neo spent two whole periods doing filing. Then, she taught us to like, open our files because our files was like, thos huge files that had this lever which you had to raise to open the ring thingies. So, we all thought that it was a complete waste of time, but Ms Neo said that there were some idiots who didn't know how to use this file. Today, when I wanted to do filing, I did it. I forced the ring thingies to open and when I opened it, I couldn't close it. This is the most stupidest thing I have ever done. Now I have to go and buy another file.

My brother went to Video Ezy and rented Moulin Rouge. He claims that he had to watch the movie because he's in some Movie Appreciation programme. Yah, that's what he says.

My Parents' Flight

My parents are gone. And I'm all alone. In this cruel sick world. My tagboard has gone crazy. I have too.

Had Chinese New Year concert just now and it was boring. The CO played and then, Ryan's mother (4U) stole the whole show and sang her lungs out. Funny! And there was this disgusting Temasek Primary School dance which was really risque. Izzati said that she wanted to dance with them. Umm.. Eww..

Ms Neo told us that we could decorate our files, in anyway we want. But we couldn't put raunchy photographs. I'm so going to decorate my files. I dunno, but all of a sudden, I love Geography and Social Studies! Can you believe that?!

My brother is now playing Mariah Carey music videos on the television in the living room, which is totally weird. But I like Mariah Carey. My mother used to like Mariah Carey before she turned into a breast-implant queen.

The Girl Who Loves Bubbles And Talks To Plants

Bubbles!

I hate Lisa and Coryn in this episode. Both of them sucked eggs! Coryn called Lisa an alcoholic bitch which was really rude. Grow up, Coryn! Lisa's gone nuts and is now best friends with Cousin It. Jayla tried to act like Elyse, which was a really bad impersonation. Nik was as orange as ever in the photo. Kyle and Nicole were totally boring when they were hosting that countdown. Bre sucked, as usual. Kim's a lesbian. And eventually, they got rid of the man (Coryn).

My father was schocked when Coryn called Lisa an alcoholic bitch. I'm even shocked that they're going tomorrow.

My cousin has ajaked me to go watch a movie. And I thought like, we would be going to Memoirs of a Geisha or something, but instead, she wants to go to this unknown foreign movie called La Journey or something like that. Seriously, I'd rather watch my hair grow.

As my homepage is Yahoo, I saw a headline which said "Model Kate Moss plans tell-all memoir". And they have a picture of her with her weird crazy eyes to prove that she's weird. I think it's going to be called "Memoirs of a Cocaine-Snorting Supermodel". And she's going to have her face on the cover snorting coke. I dunno. That's my assumption.

My Shocking News

I am in shock! No, my mother didn't tell me that she had retinitis pigmentosa and that she's going to be blind in 5 years time.

Shock #1: My parents are going to Jakarta on Friday.
Shock #2: They're going there for 9 days!

9 days! 9 days! That's so long! How will I ever survive in this poverty-stricken country without my parents. I'm going to wake up on a school day realising that my parents are millions of light-years away from me. Ya, I know it's going to be fun without my parents, but 9 days is too long. I'll feel scared. Like, as if some pontianak is going to bite my neck when I'm alone at night. And what will I eat? I'm not going to eat instant noodles everyday. I'm going to cook my own food. What if I suddenly collapse and my brothers aren't at home? My body's going to decompose for 9 days. 9 days! 9 DAYS! I mean, if it's during the CNY weekend, it's OK. But 9 days! I don't really know why they're going there. Probably go visiting I think. I think I have relatives there or something. But 9 days! What if I have like, heart failure or something. My parents are going to take like, one day to reach here. 9 days! I don't really want to sleepover at my aunties' house because I would have to bring everything there, even though one of my auntie's house is like, walking distance from my school and like, I could wake up at 7 every morning. But then it would be too awkward. Because they are constantly in their rooms doing their own stuff i.e. sleeping. I am so scared. Then, on Monday I have to go to the mosque to witness the shaving of my cousin's daughter's head, which is totally bizarre. Can I just temporarily die on Monday so I don't have to go? It's just hair. 9 days! I'm still traumatized! What if I oversleep? My mother usually forces me to wake up when I feel lazy. But 9 days!

9 days!

Too traumatized to do anything. I'm just speechless.

My Sleepy Day

Today the whole class was really sleepy and blah. I mean, seriously. Maybe it's because of the post-excursion depression or something. Or maybe it's those 3-D movies.

First was Physics and Mr Eng was his usual self. Can't elaborate too much because this is a website and anyone could read this.

Next was Malay and we had to do this worksheet. Kinda boring.

After that was Chemistry and I'm confused. Who's my Chemistry teacher? Is it Mrs Tay or Mr Chooi? Because Mr Chooi is now teaching us theory. The class was like, sleepy and such.

English was the funniest ever! Ok, Mdm Audra asked us if we knew what 'excess denied' meant. But we all thought that she said 'access denied'. So we all thought that it was like, typing the wrong password or something. It took me about 2 minutes to realise that it was totally lame. Then, someone in the class, which I will not be naming, picked his nose in public. I mean, I didn't see it, but Mdm Audra saw it and she got the shock of her life! Seriously, pick your nose privately.

Thought I heard Mr Yong's voice at the parking lot last night from my room, with his drony pronounce-s-as-th voice. When, I looked out, I couldn't see anyone. Oh my God he lives near me!

My Field Trip

Just came back from school excursion, which was super fun, although the place that we went to was super boring. Oh the irony!

Well, our class went for our 'Learning Journey' today and we went to Singapore History Museum and the Asian Civilisation Museum. The bus ride was like, the craziest bus ride I've ever been. Everyone was taking photos of ourselves even in the highway. Mostly posed like Nicole in the Bollywood photoshoot. Everyone thought I was mad. Then, we sang songs out loud. Reached at the Singapore History Museum and the boringness started.

We went to this theater which featured this guy whose wife died or something then he told his grandson the reason why there are joss sticks. What the hell does that have to do with Singapore's history?! Then, we had this funny 3-D movie which tried to entertain us with their 3-D effects by throwing dustbin lids to us, visually.

While waiting for the bus, Nani had an unglam moment in which I will not go into detail because I'm already tired. Took bus. The bus ride was a little less rowdy. Reached Asian Civilisation Museum and it was boringness to the extreme. We had to do stupid worksheets which had questions like, "What colour do you think envy symbolises?" Umm... purple? I mean, what the hell does that have to do with Asian civilisation? Outside the museum we saw this couple who had their wedding photoshoot there. The woman looked like she was only covered by a towel and I'm really surprised there weren't any mothers-in-law. 4R also had a photoshoot and we tried to make a star, which didn't turn out so well.

Been reading Ms Neo's website and people have been commenting about how stupid the rule book is and blah blah blah. I mean, they really say that it's just socks and that the school is over-reacting that we're wearing ankle socks and the complaining goes on and on. You wanna know what I think? JUST FUCKING WEAR YOUR SOCKS ABOVE THE ANKLE BONE! Stop complaining! You should be fortunate enough that you have a kind principal who gives coffee to her colleagues and that you can wear coloured shoes. And they're also saying that ankle socks won't affect your studies. Hello?! They affect other people's perception on our school, you stupid no-brain people! Thank God nobody from 4R complained too. I'm thinking of starting this union where members of the union wear knee-high socks, like those British schoolgirls. That would be fun, wouldn't it? Any applicants?

Ok, that's all that I have to blog about. Goodbye everyone! Till next time, I bid my farewell to everyone who's reading my blog. Love ya! I still haven't done my homework and I'm super hungry. Now I kind of want waffles. Don't worry. Next week.

My Bloody Sunday

I couldn't think of any titles. Seriously. Oh and I did not bleed, nor did I drink blood.

First, I was reading Memoirs in my room when all of a sudden, my mother went to take a peek and gasped like as if I was reading a porn magazine or something. Then, she just snatched it and was analyzing every bit of Zhang Ziyi's face and she looked at me and said, "You can borrow it from the library you know! You just wasted $16!" Like, I'm using my pocket money to buy stuff that is good for your brain, and not junk.

Did Math the whole day except when I was reading. Yay! Anyway, my mother had this talk to me and asked me what I wanted to be when I grow up. She keeps on telling me about this guy she knows who became a gynaecologist, a person who studies the female reproduction system. What the? She wants me to help deliver babies and talk to patients about their 'down there' part? And how come I have never met this guy my mother constantly talked about. Then, she told me to try to take up courses that involve science in it. Sigh. I'd rather be a geisha.

My Bad Neighbourhood

I think I might be living in some ghetto neighbourhood or something. I mean, seriously. Today, I wanted to go to the shops to buy Hichew, which I am totally addited to. So went there. And when I went to the cashier, the shopkeeper, whose a woman in her early 20s, was reading a magazine. I waited for about 10 seconds and she was still reading it, while eating Pocky sticks strawbery flavoured. Then, I cleared my throat really loudly. She looked up with the most pissed face ever imagined and she gave me the change. A message to the shopkeeper auntie: "You're a stupid, stupid bitch. I really hope you read this." Walked to the lifts. Found out that there was pee inside both of the lifts. Had to drag myself up the stairs to the second floor where I live.

Bought a novel. It is called 'Memoirs of a Geisha'. It's such an erotic novel. Ok, when Zhang Ziyi was small, she saw her sister's boyfriend playing with her breasts. Wow! Who would ever thought that conservative Asians would do such a thing.

There's like this whole wasteland near my house. I think there might be snakes or polar bears or chimps or Big Foots. I think I might explore the place. Or maybe I'll just ride a bike to Changi Village or Changi Prison or something. I need to explore the place where I live, do you know what I mean?

The Girl Who Gets A Boob Job

Janice! Janice! And more Janice!

Sigh, if only Janice faced Tyra. She would slap her till she needs a boob job.

Diane got eliminated. Who? The fat one. My mother calls her fat and asks me why she's in this competition. Actually she's not that fat. She looks fat because she's in a flock of anorexic models.

Need to buck up on my English. Maybe I shall buy novels and stuff. Maybe I'll buy Memoirs of a Geisha with Zhiyi Zhang (that's what Americans call her) on the cover with a complete white make-up and bright blue eyes. What kind of Asian gets bright blue eyes?

Or maybe I shall buy Lion, Witch and Wardrobe. Nah! Too childish.

Don't feel like talking about ANTM.

My Crappy Talk

Today, I was like, talking crap for my Geog project. I mean, seriously! Well, the rest of my teammates were like, scared to talk in front of the whole class, so I just blabbered and blabbered and blabbered and the whole class laughed. Omg I'm funny! Yay!

Nothing to blog about. I'm now in a depressed state because I didn't attend CCA yesterday because I had to do the project and Ms Woon was like, "This will be the last time you skip CCA. Just because you're Sec 4 doesn't mean you don't need to come for CCA." It was like some sort of prophecy. I mean, so many people don't go to Enterprise every week and she doesn't complain. Why me? And I didn't skip. I was in the library all along, doing Geog. And she said that CCA is more important than studies. Huh?! Sigh. I wish I was in Chinese Orchestra or something. Shirley said that nobody cares if you skip.

My Plastic Note

Hey guess what?! I have a $2 plastic note! Yeah! I think it's rare or something. I hope they don't really change all the paper notes to plastic. It gives the plastic notes a rarity value.

Ok, whatever... Anyways, didn't realise how tough it is to write an exciting speech. I shall listen to Morning Digests in future, no matter how boring they are.

Mrs Tay (Chem teacher) is in the hospital and is coming back after Chinese New Year. Mr Chooi used to replace us but now, there's this woman called Mrs Carol Chan and she's as boring as death. And she addresses people by "Young man" and "Young woman".

BTW Watched Project Runway last night and was shocked! They didn't really have a runway, they just had a white version of a red carpet. And Wendy's daughter was as freaky as ever! Her stare is like, death itself! I'd bet she would make a great sociopath.

Life is getting boringer.

My Never-Ending Homework

Ahhhh!!!

I have like, millions of homework to do and here I am, blogging.

I'm going to do Morning Digest with Izzati and I literally need my mother's help. Haha, well, it's a topic where you need your parents' help. I'll keep the topic to myself to give people suspense...

Nobody's at home.

Boring.

Lame.

WHAT PATSY SAID

• Were were talking about tourism and Ms Neo said, "If you go to Thailand and get breast implants, you would still be considered a tourist." Heehee!
• Forgot

Ms Neo was kind of scolding the whole class because Marco talked too much. Actually, she was only scolding Marco, but she tried to cover it up by scolding the whole class.

My Cramps

I've suddenly got like, cramps that really happens unexpectedly. I think I might be suffering from PMS. First, I was riding my bike to Loyang Point when all of a sudden, I had cramps and just fell on the spot. Two people were there and they didn't give a damn whether I survived the fall or not.

Then, when I was cleaning the bathroom, I had cramps and just quickly went to the dining room to sit down. No!! I don't wanna be the guy from The Hot Chick.

There were some rupiah coins on my father's desk and I mistook them for silver chocolate coins! Seriously, they're so light, it could be easily forged or something. No wonder there's so much forgery in Indonesia.

My Saturday Afternoon

Couldn't think of a title entry. Boring.

A Maths is starting to get really hard. And Mr Yong explains at super-speed, which is kind of irritating. I never thought I would say this, but I miss Ms Chia. Sigh.

Found out that geisha means a tea-ceromony entertainer or whatever. Now I don't wanna watch the movie. Seriously, I thought that a geisha is like, a female samurai who seduces their male enemies and kills them right before they make love.

ANTM 1 went to Paris, ANTM 2 went to Milan, ANTM 3 went to Tokyo, ANTM 4 went to Cape Town, ANTM 5 went to London and ANTM 6 is going to Bangkok. Well, actually they already went. And I can bet you that Tyra is going to cast an Asian girl. Then, the Asian girl is going to feel special and all that at Thailand and then she ticks some girl off until she says, "OHH MYY GOODDDDD!!! SHUUUUUTT UUUPPPPP!!!" But why in the blue hell Bangkok?! I thought it's full of transverstites and prostitutes and stuff? Please, Tyra! Come to Singapore!

Tag.

My Student Handbook

Got the student handbook. Opened it. Saw Ryan's face on the first page. Speechless.

The format is nice but the printing kind of sucked. I just said that phrase and the whole world is against me. Well, the handbook has like one-page photos and you can't really see the people's faces. I mean, they could just greyscale the photo right? Or have another better printing company to do it. That's why I was PMSy during Maths. Also it's because of my stupid ulcer. It's like, the biggest ulcer I've ever had... EVER! I hate this.

Oh Btw, my 'O' Levels is one day after my birthday (OCTOBER 29). I don't want presents but at least wish me happy birthday. That would be sweet, because nobody really wishes me happy birthday. Sad, but true.

So put my birthday (29 OCTOBER) on your handbook, even if you hate me. Thanks. I'll try to remember your birthday.

The Girl With The Disclaimer

It's like, raining like shit. And I don't mean that as a literal statement. Did this physical test and just wanted to die. Seriously!

Anyway, last night's episode was really boring because they never showed the parts where Kim and Sarah made out under the blankets. I mean it! Seriously!

Wasn't a huge fan of Sarah. Cassandra went home and everyone celebrated. Tyra and Wendy Pepper teamed up to make the most diabolical plan in the fashion industry. Tyra instructed Wendy to make for Sarah the glitzy gown and the huge headdress that Vegas showgirls wear and Wendy orders Sue Wong to make Sarah wear it or else her daughter's going to send to Sue Wong lots and lots of paintings. Of course, Sue Wong didn't decline the offer.

Kim's proof that she really is a lesbian.



Kim: I'm a lesbian!
Sarah:Oh I'll make out with you anytime!



And they did...



Awww... this is so cute. Eating breakfast together...



...After a night of making out under the blankies.



Kyle's sad that they were torn apart from Tyra the Evil Bitch.



Meanwhile, Tyra shows off her fats in front of the whole world.




Spot the difference!



1, 2, 3... BAM!



1, 2, 3... BAM! Practise it in the mirror. It's really fun!

My Lateness

I've been blog-hopping just now and I had the urge to slap some people out of their world of delusion. Seriously.

Ok, well, the day started of bright and early. Woke up to a fresh start and remembered to bring my tie because there was going to be an individual 'photoshoot' for everyone today. Notice the aprostaphes (sp?) and if only you could transmit sarcasm over the internet. Anyway, I took 21 to the bus stop after Tampines Stadium and 3 bus 10s passed by and they were jam-packed with students. Met Shamsydar at the bus stop along with her cats that she keeps inside her massive bag. I suggested we take a cab, but she said that she had no money. Then I asked her where she put her Hari Raya money, and she was like, "You received money?!" Wow. I'm very fortunate. Ya, even though I only received like, $50, it's still money you know. It's so weird that my family's the only people that gives away cash. Anway, we boarded a SINGLE-decker bus at 7:20.

Reached school at 8 and Mr Cuthbert told us to complain to SBS. He didn't take down our names, which is quite bizarre. Went to class and I was anticipating cheers or questions being shot at me like "OMG what happened?" or "How come you so late?" or "Are you OK?" or "Did you kena punish?" but the only person who talked to me was Nani who was telling me that she took a cab with Nazurah. If only I took a cab. I was so terasa.

Photo-taking is indescribable.

Watched Project Runway on Monday and Wendy Pepper is the freakiest kid I've known! Second was me! Seriously, she sent a painting to the judges and I bet one of them is going to be like, "It looked like my cat ate a ball of yarn and chewed it out!". Anyways, she seriously could audition for The Exorcist or Hide and Seek or could act as Sadako. Because. She. Talks. Sentence. By. Sentence. And they call her cute. They must have been hypnotised or something.

Stupid commercials! Now I feel like watching Memoirs of a Geisha!

My Three Lunches

My neighbourhood is literally full of shit! And I mean that as a literal statement!

This all happened when I was coming home from school one day when I smelt shit. Then, in the middle of the void deck of the block next to me, lay 3 yellowish-brown droppings. Ok, I shouldn't mention its details no more. Anyway, I find it quite weird because animals have the courtesy to shit on the grass. Then, when I was coming home from Loyang Point the next day, under my flat, was another pile of shit. I had to avoid that. I was assuming that the animal had diarrhea or something. Then, the next day, I took the stairs when I needed to go to the shop and thank God I saw what was waiting for me at the bottom of the stairs - SHIT! I mean, I had to go up and take the lift down from the 2nd floor. Everytime I go down, it's like a game of hopscotch because you'll have to really jump around to avoid the shit. My mother thinks it's a cat. My father thinks it's a dog and said that we can report to the police. And what? Sentence the dog to life imprisonment? I think it's a human being because like I said, dogs and cats shit on the grass. They're civilised animals, unlike humans.

Ok, I think I've become a real glutton. I mean, I ate 3 lunches! All during the period of 2 hours. So, after school, decided to eat lunch at school. Ate Kuay Teow Hongkong. Then, when I was going home, I stopped by Mac at White Sands to get McChicken. Went home and ate. 10 minutes later, felt hungry, went to Mac at Loyang Point to buy Fillet-o-Fish. Next thing you'll know I'll be on TAF Club.

Yay! Taggers! If you come to my blog, please tag. It's common courtesy. Thanks.

My New Tagboard

What the hell is wrong with my computer?! I can't go to Photobucket or Shoutmix. Like, that's so stupid.

Patsy Neo's so funny! Hee! Every week I'm going to have a segment called "What Patsy Said".

WHAT PATSY SAID

• Ms Neo asked Shaun to rub the board. He does with his left hand. Ms Neo asks if Shaun is left-handed. Shaun says yes. Ms Neo says, "You know, they say that left-handed people are very intelligent. But of course, there are exceptions." Ha!
• Ms Neo told us about this travel-mate whom she went to Egypt with during the holidays and since Egypt is dusty, the travel-mate kept on cleaning her suitcase. Ha!
• On board: My name is Ms Neo. Please do not touch my fish. Ha!
• She gave us target setting and told us to write what we wanted to be when we grow up. She says, "Please be realistic. If you are a boy, please don't put 'air stewardess'. You need sex change first." Ha!
• Ms Neo asks us to do this brainstorm on the board and write all that's got to do with SS. Joanna suggested this rude word and Ms Neo wrote 'GNS' on board. She says, "Eh, later don't go to other class and say 'You GNS ah'!" Funny! and only 4Rers will get the joke.

Nobody comes to my blog. Sad.

My Twisted Computer

What the hell is wrong with my computer? It's gone bonkers!

Please do me a favour. Go to these two websites and see if you can get into it. Then, comment, don't tag. But comment at the end of the post.

PHOTOBUCKET
SHOUTMIX

Thank you.

My Unfantastic Rice Burger

Double post. OMG Ebony blogged. Cool!

Oh well, anyways, the new principal has been strict from today onwards. She has banned shoes except for white, black, dark blue and gray. What is this, prison? And the principal looks like a kindergarten teacher, seriously. No offence.

I don't really know what is wrong with my computer. I can't really get to Photobucket. The window just blanks. There must be a virus or something. Please tag and tell me if you can go to the photobucket website. Thanks!

Became a greedy pig again and went to McDonald's at 3 even though I already ate lunch at 1.15. Wanted to try the Fan-tastic Burger. It's just plain rice that's pressed together. And when you open it it just crumbles. And the beef is actually like, gravy cooked with cabbage like, Chinese-style, I think. And it costs $3.00. What a ripoff! I mean seriously! I'd rather cook myself. So don't buy it, people.

The Girl Who Needs A Miracle

Hi! ANTM last night was great. I mean, I was like, Oh Em Gee when they told me that I'll get braids down to my waist to represent my people. I mean, like, 13 hours in that chair while weaveologists braid my hair is simply amazing! Like, I told them, "Don't Get it Twisted!" because if you get it twisted, I wouldn't look FEIRCE! I also had to tolerate 13 hours of whining by Miss Beauty Queen slash sociopath Cassandra! I mean, this is an oppurtunity of a lifetime and so, you musn't get it twisted! So Don't Get it Twisted!

Lisa's Ok. It's just that she never got any motherly love and pherhaps her mother got it twisted! I mean, why did I ever pick her as my partner! I'd rather have Cassandra! I mean, she's messin' with my mind! Oh, and I've also got big ta-tas and she doesn't have any lady lumps. Maybe it's a neglected daughter thing. I dunno. And stupid Jay tells me that I look like a dead carcass on a fence. WTF is that supposed to mean?! And his skin tone is so orange, and his hair colour is so indescribable that maybe it's a new colour! I mean, seriously, I should tell him not to Get it Twisted! Anyway, isn't a carcass dead?! What a stupid, stupid twisted bitch.

Was kind of expecting Cassandra to go but she got called out first. And I was in the final two with Diane. Of course, I got it twisted and got eliminated because Tyra said that maybe it's just a dream. Shut up, fattie! And she said that I look like a person who teaches models to model. Well, I'm gonna have to teach her a thing or two. Seriously, Oprah wannabe. She totally got it twisted! And thank god Channel 5 didn't cut the part where I was imitating Cassandra with the puppet dolls. Phew. Well, they didn't get it twisted!

So Don't Get it Twisted, Ok?!

Well, there's this guy from Singapore that kind of looks like me, his name is Hakim BTW. Anyway, he went to school and he told me that he's now 172 cm, which is like, 5"7' which is considered kind of short in the modelling world. And he was 165 cm last year so he grew by 7 cm in one year, which is totally untwisted! Oh well, Kate Moss is the size of a midget (5"5') and I'm 5"10'. That's ok, because he'll never get it twisted.

My Phunny Teachers

Sorry I haven't blogged for quite a while. There was a lot of bugs in my computer and my father used insecticide to spray my computer.

I must say that being a Sec 4 is really really weird. You feel happy and scared at the same time. Happy because you're older than the majority. Scared because of my O Levels, which is really round the corner.

Some of my teachers have changed. Ms Patsy Neo is teaching us Humanities (Elec Geog and SS). Mrs Tay is teaching us Chem. Mdm. Audra is teaching us English and Mr Yong teaching Maths. Unfortunately, our Physics teacher is still Mr Eng. Stupid shit. I want Murbarak!

First period was Ms Neo and she was super funny! Hee! Nicknamed Shaun Mr. Sarcasm and Marco the half-sentence man. Next was malay, which was really weird because Cikgu Nora was acting like my mother and lecturing us. After that was Mrs Tay and she's super lame. Well, she's kind of funny, but most of it's lame. But I don't really understand why my classmates roll on the floor laughing. Recess. Mr Yong. Lives. Near. Me. Seriously. Well, he's the kind of person that can't pronounce 's'. So he'll call Izzati 'Iyyati'. A bit funny, but kind of rude. He called science teachers 'crazy'. After that was Mdm Audra. Thought that she was boring but actually she's kind of funny. She told the whole class that her mother liked insulting her. Poor Lisa. And when she comes up with anecdotes, she talks in a weird Hindustan accent. Other than that, she talks like an English professor. Seriously, she has a store full of colourfull adjectives! Hee! She said that.

Didn't realise that there was drama in my school. I'll just have to stay out of it and be neutral. Cos' I don't want no drama. No no no no drama. No no drama. No no no no drama.

Oh BTW something happened to my tagboard. It's temporary unavailable.

I have decided to start singing tomorrow. I don't care if I can't sing or dance. I'm going to sing. Ya, I've officially gone nuts!

My Unhappy New Year

Waaaaaooowwww!

I came back from Johor. Actually, I came back on the same day I left, so it was a one-day thing. The whole causeway was full of idiot drivers who wanted to cut the queue but then the traffic police was there, so they got in trouble. So, me and my cousins and my uncle killed time by counting how many of the stupid drivers were there. So, we reached there at 10 but the shopping centre full of pirated DVDs and games and cheap stuff were closed, so we had to go to another shopping centre which was full of women's clothing, so that my mother and her auntie could shop till they drop. After that blah blah blah went to the shopping centre to find out that all the CSI DVDs didn't have any stock, and the guy wanted my father to buy Alias, which he pronounced as 'Ee-lias' instead of 'Ay-lious'. Bought a couple of movies. I wanted to buy Emily Rose and my father agreed but somehow he didn't buy it. My brother got this 50 Cent movie. Then, we went to the game shop to buy PS2 games. I bought a PC game called The Movies! Yes! It's like Sims 2, except that you control the studio and the directors and the actors, everything! So, went to eat at this place called Sedap Corner when suddenly, my brother made up the most unfunniest joke ever! He said, "What if we put an 'o' in between 'r' and 'n' in corner?" It took me about 30 seconds to figure out that it meant 'coroner'. I mean seriously, if he said that when he's doing stand-up comedy, he's going to get egged! After that, went to shop for clothes. My mother was questioning my taste. There was this white shirt that had matrix-like thingys falling down the sleeve. I liked it, but my mother was like, "It looked like my cat just ate a ball of yarn and spitted it out!" And the size was so difficult. I tried on the M size and it was too small, so I tried on the L size and it was too big. So what am I? XM? In the end I bought two baggy L shirts which didn't have matrix-like thingys falling down the sleeve. I also bought a wallet. That place was a 100 times better than Tampines Mall. I mean, seriously, and their store design is so cool. The shop that I shopped in had an ice-cream truck as their cash counter. Went back. My cousin kept on bugging me to let him listen to my music, so I let him. He was laughing at Confessions of a Broken Heart because Lindsay Lohan kept on saying "Daughter to Father!". He then asked me what kind of song La Tortura is, so I said that it was an Arab song and he believed me. Kids can be conned in many different ways I can tell you.

Came back at 8. Tried Movies which was super cool. Slept through the countdown. Woke up realising it's 2006. Cried because it's my O Level year. My New Year's Resolution will be to be a robot when I'm in school. I am so going to process every single word that comes out of the teacher's mouth and write it down in my notebook.

Anyway, we went to my auntie's house to celebrate the new year and my cousin's b'day (28 Dec). Went to Tampines first to pick up the cake. I was hungry, so I wanted to buy Old Chang Kee, which made my parents go 'Ewwwwww'. She thinks it's non-halal, even though there's a halal cert right in front of the sneeze-guard. Then it was like me and my brother vs. my parents. In the end we won thanks to me because my father bought fries and I refused to eat it. I hated fries anyway. So my mother gave me $5 to spend on whatever I wanted. My brother asked me to buy a curry puff and one breaded prawn stick. Why I blog about irrelevent stuff I really do not know!

Reached there. My mother and my auntie went for, what we call a makeover at the salon. They came back with their hair shortened. My mother looks really weird. She has her hair super curly and short, which isn't really nice. But everyone had to say that it was nice. Had to leave at 8.30 because my mother's Indonesian soap opera was on at 9. It was kind of funny and very soapy. But those people talk so fast that you hardly understand them. Thank God for subtitles.

School starts tomorrow. Bye, fun!