Saturday, December 10, 2005

My Foreign Visitors

My family's religious teacher from Australia is coming to stay at our house from Friday to Monday. Whoop de doo. I'm not really excited because his whole family is coming too. And his son is a bit bratty and spoilt. And they're going to take up my room so I'm gonna have to sleep right next to the balcony, where pontianaks lurk. Great. I don't think I'm able to use the computer because my mother thinks it's just plain downright rude, even though the son is going to play on my Playstation 24/7. Arrrggghhhh [does what Lisa does in the ANTM commercial].

Oh BTW my mother asked me if I wanted to follow her to Indonesia and go to the religious teacher's kampung after my O Levels. Well, they're actually Indonesians. Of course my mother didn't ask me, all she said was, "After your O Levels, do you want to follow me to the ustadz's kampung? No? Maybe? Yes? Ok!" And I don't even understand Indonesian language! Yesterday it was official that my mother wanted to send me far far away. She told me that I could go the a 'prasantren' or however you pronounce it or spell it. It's in Indonesia or something. My mother said that it's a boarding house of some sort where you read the Qur'an during the day and you learn martial arts in the night. And you can't watch semi-nude, catfighting, nude-only-being-covered-by-bubbles, screaming, nude-only-covered-by-their-hair, lesbian, nude-only-covered-by-diamonds, atheist, legally blind, lupus-carrying, nude-only-covered-by-leaves, drunk, religious, impetigo-carrying, witness of Jehovah, buliemic, plus-size, bisexual, half-Persian, topless-only-covered-by-hair, bitchy, topless-only-covered-by-newspapers-stuck-in-London-phonebooth-with-5-other-women, collapsing, bald, boring, objecting-to-nudity, crazy women on television i.e. America's Next Top Model. I just kept quiet during the whole time hoping that my mother was only joking. I don't wanna be strapped with bombs! I've heard of these such places! If she really isn't joking, I am so going to burn my passport and I'm serious! She said that I could be there for a month. A month!!! A MONTH!!!!! What did I ever do to her that made her hate me so badly!!!! Arrrrggghhhh [does what Lisa does in the ANTM commercial]

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On a lighter tone, we all know that we all love Brittany. Why didn't I like her during the show? Kissy kissy!