A Tranny Mess

There is a difference between dreaming and pretending. I wish Lacuna was true.

Here's Isis, the tranny who's gonna appear on the latest season of ANTM!!!! THIS WEDNESDAY!!!!! TWO HOUR PREMIERE!!!!!!




Ok she kinda looks horrible and incredibly old in person. And I was reading the forums and they stated that she still has a penis!!! I thought it was against the rules or something! And her voice sounds like Capote.

And Tyra totally knew that she was a tranny. Oh, so she happened to want to invite a girl over who appeared on the previous cycle photoshoot, and it just so happened that this girl is actually a guy. Tyra is totally milking it for publicity. Wouldn't it be awesome if they had a nude photoshoot? Ok, maybe not.

Head Over Feet

It's freaking OVER!!! OH MY GOD I'm so happieeeee!!! Poor Biotech peeps. They have two papers tomorrow. I totally would like, go crazy.

Probably the worst series of exams EVER. Not really in how I'll fare, but total lack of sleep. I had the whole of Tuesday and Wednesday to study Imm but I was totally procrastinating. In the end I started studying on Wednesday afternoon and only slept for 2 hours. Yay!

School starts in 1.5 months. Next semester is so gonna be weird, with only one lecture theatre used for a subject for us, and not two. I don't know if it's a good thing or a bad thing.

MOVIES!!!

ANTM 11 this Wednesday!! THIS COMING WEDNESDAY!!!!! I can't wait for the revelation of the tranny!!! I hope she totally gathers up the contestants and be like, "I'm legally a man, and I'm gonna be about 30 when I go, completely woman." Hey, where have I heard that before?

Anyway, I've been watching small 5-minutes segments of ANTM 3 after every topic revised when I was studying. Man, Yaya is a huge snobbish bitch. But man, oh man, did that cycle rock!

Why can't more people watch 30 Rock? What I love about 30 Rock and The Office is that you can watch it again and again and you'll find minute juicy tidbits that made you realise, "How come I didn't catch that before?" Like when Liz's ex from Cleveland wanted to crash at her place and she was trying to be all hard-to-get, and when her ex was leaving, she was all acting cool until the taxi carrying her ex was off into the night. And she's like, look what you dumped, and right after the taxi leaves, she sees a bunch of teenagers and says, "Oh God! Youths!" and runs back to her apartment. HAHAHAHAHAHA!!! I don't know, but the fact that she said youths is so funny!! Give her 3 Emmys!!! Or 9 gold medals!!!

After Let It Will Be

One more! I can say goodbye to A for FPath, because I hate memorizing. It's stupid. And I was like, so confident seh macam ingat tau the right answer but in the end the answer was so simple on the notes. On the other hand, Mol Gen might bring me an A. Yay! Now there's only one left.

Watched the news this morning on TV Mobile. I'm not being discriminatory or racist, but I'm so annoyed by the fact that the table tennis players answered the interviews in Chinese. I mean, learn the universal language, so that non-Chinese speaking people will accept you as a Singaporean.

Was reading Perez earlier and I'm sorry but Michael Phelps' Sports Illustrated cover is so so ugly. It's supposed to play off this photograph of Mark Spitz wearing all of his gold medals. The major difference is that Mark Spitz's medal lanyard ribbon thingy wasn't a ribbon at all, it actually looks like a thin metal chain. So it kind of looks cool with all the medals and stuff. On the other hand, the medals for the Beijing Olympics have those lanyard red ribbon. I mean, it looks fine, but if you wear 8 of these around your neck and adjust all the gold medals, it looks like you're wearing a dress if you look at the photograph from like, shoulder up. And the red background with the red ribbon! It's blinding me! And I actually think he's a good looking man, but what is up with the butter face? I don't know, maybe he only looks good in water.

Anyway, I wanna talk about Avril Lavigne's concert. Funny how the government deems it too sexy and inappropriate, especially due to the fact that "It's not in the good spirit of [the country's] National Day", while finding out whether a politician was fucked in the ass isn't. Sorry for the language, but... you know.... Anyway, I seriously don't get their politics. Like, all I know is there's a sodomy charge. And.... They didn't elaborate!

Usually every week I will talk about how awesome 30 Rock is, so this week is no exception. I am totally in love with Kathy Geiss. She actually plays a small role and is on-screen for like, less than 5 minutes in total for this season. But she is awesome!! She actually took over Jack's position and she decorated the office with posters of unicorns and she has a toy baby unicorn with her. And behind her desk she has a poster of Mark Wahlberg when he was a rapper or whatever. It's sooooo funny!!!! Hahahah!!! And she eats flowers. Heeheehee!!!

Totally loved the Liz's sandwich storyline. Somebody ate her sandwich and she was all crazy and told Kenneth, "I don't know how, but you're gonna get me a sandwich, or I'm gonna cut your face so bad you'll have a chin. YOU'LL ALL HAVE CHINS!!!"

HAHAHAHA. Ok I'm off.

I Kicked A Frog

...And I didn't like it.

Urgh! This month is the worst!!!! Somebody either coughed or sneezed in front of my face! Fine I'm exaggerating. We were like, 3 feet apart, but still! I felt a slight drizzle! And cover your mouth. Because, ew! And I accidentally kicked a frog! I was so scared I might have killed it or something. But it was dark, it was damp, I was walking on the grass. I actually thought I kicked a snail because it felt like a shell and looked behind to see the snail and all I saw was a freaking frog! Frogs exist in Singapore! Surprise surprise! Fortunately, I did not step on it. Can you imagine? Ok maybe don't.

Urgh! And I also hit my head against the wall when I was falling on my bed. And it still hurts. Boohoo. When will the exams go?

I totally feel kind of guilty for being the only person to get an A for one of my assignments when everybody else got either a B or a C, when I honestly thought I sucked eggs and a couple of their presentations were so much better. I guess being a teacher's pet really pushes your grades up. But still.

Anyway, I don't think I'll find work during the holidays because of the fasting month. I get hungry and masuk angin easily. I'm never going back to CSC. Even though I kind of want to. But no! Because I'll be watching many many movies. Yay!

Almost Famous

Finally Youtubed some of the music videos. Can you believe that today is the first time I actually saw the Damaged video, only because I heard the song and it's stuck in my head. The video's so weird, especially the ending where the girls were operating on some guy's heart or whatever.

When will the exams come? I'm getting so freaking restless!! And I'm sick!!!

Watched some of the Olympics. Got to watch the 200m finals. That Jamaican guy broke the world record and got first. The entertaining part was after the race ended. So, this Jamaican guy is celebrating and dancing, rightfully so. The camera's focused on him because he broke the world record. And the rest of the athletes are being ignored by the camera, rightfully so. Then when Jamaican guy is dancing, all of a sudden, this guy from USA who came in 3rd suddenly comes in and hugs the Jamaican guy and is all extra. I mean, the guy who came in 2nd was cool and wasn't hogging the spotlight. On the other hand, USA guy was all cocky and was like, "YEAHH!!!! WE MADE IT!!!!" to the Jamaican guy. Then they dissociate and then the camera's focused on the USA guy because the commentators were talking about how he could've been disqualified because they think that he stepped out of the line. So they show the replays and he kind of does, but it's not official yet. Then the camera focuses on USA guy who's all like, "FUCK YEAHHH!!!!" and showing his blue tongue and all and then he's all celebrating and all and then the screen shows that he's officially disqualified. The peak of the hilarity was that the screen at the stadium showed him and beside his name was DSQ in big bold letters, and he doesn't see the screen and is still celebrating cockily. Then somebody tells him about his disqualification and immediately, you can see the smile turn into a frown in an instant. IT'S SO FUNNY!!!!!!! HAHAHAHAHA!!!! See, you shouldn't get all cocky. I should've taped it!

Anyway, I was randomly watching TV in the morning and TRL was on. It's been such a freaking long time since I watched it. What happened to TRL? How come it's so sucky now. And what I hated the most about MTV Asia is..... They were showing a recap of the videos and Number 1 was I Kissed A Girl. MTV Asia muted the song AND actually censored the "Girl" from the title! I mean, fine, right? Well, the problem is that MTV Asia also airs Jackass and it's fine if they show asses and never censor them. I'm so pissed off! I would've written a letter to them if I weren't so busy/sick.

Anyhoo, the nominees for the VMA's are already up.

VIDEO OF THE YEAR
Chris Brown - Forever
Jonas Brothers - Burnin' Up
Pussycat Dolls - When I Grow Up
Britney Spears - Piece Of Me
The Ting Tings - Shut Up And Let Me Go

You have to admit that this year's is really weak. I mean, the only video I like is When I Grow Up. And Forever? With You was so much better. And the freaking Jonas Brothers are nominated. Please don't win!!!! I watched the video... It was OK. Not Video Of The Year worthy. Piece Of Me is also OK, not Video Of The Year worthy. Shut Up And Let Me Go, on the other hand, is good, but doesn't it remind you of the White Stripe's video?

Screwed

Who fucked it up for their HTech test? Ooh! Ooh! Ooh!!!! Me!!! Me!!! ME!!!! And a whole lot of other people...

Anyway, Singapore won silver. But people from China won for us. I actually watched China thrash poor man's China, but then it was such a bore so I ended up watching other events. And Michael Phelps won 8 golds! Man, you could melt all the gold and make a bigger medal!

Urgh! I can't wait for the stupid stinky exams to be over.

I have only one word to describe last night's episode of 30 Rock: BRILLIANT!!!

Can they just give Tina Fey 2 Emmys? Because she's awesome! Totally loved Tracy's storyline about how he wanted to make his kids proud. So he decided to combine his two favourite pasttimes: Video Games and Porn. So he wants to make a porn video game and Frank (the guy with the trucker hat) tells him it's impossible and then suddenly it get's all Amadeus and Frank gets jealous and Tracy's like, a horny version of Mozart. Heeheehee!!

And Liz was amazing!! Like, the writer's hated her because the script was missing, and Liz says the most magical words, "You think this is my passion? I had my dreams too! I was supposed to live with the gorillas!" And then she ran ala Phoebe from Friends. Heeheehee!!!

Doctor Spaceman was sooooo funny!!!! HAHAHAHAHAAHA, because the big boss was in a diabetic coma, and when the doctor wanted to inject him, the doctor was all squemish and was like, "Ew, ew, ew!" Hahaha!! And then he said that they couldn't inject to his heart because he can't determine the exact location, because every human is different. Hahaha!

Lumbering

All hell broke loose when some bug landed on my bed.

Anyway, OH MY GOD watch this!!!


Weightlifting Accident 2008 Beijing - Celebrity bloopers here

This is so scary!!! It was so graphic it wasn't allowed on Youtube, so I actually had to Google it.

So here's the thing with weightlifting. There are two categories: Clean & Jerk, and Snatch. I know, how do I know, right? Well, Clean & Jerk is fine, because the person has to bring the weight to his neck first before carrying it above him. On the other hand, Snatch is crazy, because you have to carry the weight directly from the floor to above your head and then, stand up. The thing with Snatch is that the swinging direction from floor to above your head might cause the weight to go behind you. And that's what happened. Urgh!!! Ok why am I explaining this.

I fucking hate HTech! So many things to remember. And the notes are like, the ugliest notes EVER!!! Like, don't these lecturers understand the concept of making our notes attractive and neat, so that we don't barf everytime we see them?

Anyway, watched latest episode of Project Runway. Firstly, They don't really suck as much as last episode. Suede is still annoying the hell out of me with his third-person. And surprisingly, I STILL don't have a favourite. I guess I kind of like the two black girls, Fat Fatima (the East African refugee) and that other one who looks like Whitney on crack. I'm sorry, but she really does look like she's on meth or something. And fucking Stella is still in the competition! They were guessing on who's their muse (who was hinted to them as a fashion icon) and Stella was hoping that it's Sharon Osbourne because she's the queen of rock. Umm... Is she even a singer in the first place? Ughh!!! She should be in the Guinnes Book Of Records for being the oldest poseur. But in the end Brooke Shields was the muse and they had to design an outfit for her new Sex And The City/Desperate Housewives rip-off called Lipstick Jungle. It's coming to Star World. And it was totally awesome when Kenley laughed right in front of that guy when he said that he has great taste.

But speaking of Stella, she should be put in purgatory by locking her in the Disney prison I mentioned in the last post.

Smelly Cat

10 more days till hari aku mampos!

Did you hear about the little girl who lip-synced during the Olympics Opening Ceremony? Apparently, the real singer was not cute enough. Like, woah! That must be a really sharp hot dagger to the heart. Can you imagine? Like, "Hey! You're the girl who was too ugly to be featured in the Olympics!" And apparently, the girl who lip-synced didn't realise that she lip-synced. It's totally reminiscent of the episode when Phoebe made a music video of Smelly Cat and she didn't realise that it's not her voice.

Speaking of Friends, I was watching it the other day and Phoebe was talking about coronary embolism. I totally got that!!! I'm smart!

Anyway, I'm kind of watching the Olympics. They're having a lot of swimming events. Blame the new Speedo for the constant breaking of World/Olympic records.

And Roger Federer is out!!! Awww... Poor thing.

And apparently, there's some scandal involving the Chinese gymnasts. Minimum age requirements are supposed to be 16, but this girl is actually 13. My eyebrows aren't raised. Like, seriously? I watched some of the female gymnastics and these girls from China are so small and prepubescent they look like they're 8-year-olds.

Lastly, I HATE. Repeat: HATE!. Disney. Because they keep on churning these teenagers who have very little talent and they whore them up so that they can lure preteens into buying their merchandises. There's an interview on Miley Cyrus in Seventeen magazine and she talked about how she was with one of the Jonas Brothers for 2 years and how they had to keep it a secret and how she was his "24/7" and that he wanted her to highlight her hair and when they broke up she dyed her hair black because she wanted to be hardcore and didn't want to look pretty.

Comments:
a) 2 years ago meant that she was 13. Wow. What a great role model!
b) Was she even remotely famous 2 years ago? And I remember Jonas Brothers become popular only a year ago.
c) What a great way of saying that Asians are ugly

Yes, I read Perez. So sue me. It just annoys me that these people are like.... annoying me.

Anyway, apparently there's these two new girls in the scene called Demi Lovato and Selena Gomez. That Gomez girl's on that Wizard show on Disney Channel, aka poor man's version of Harry Potter/Sabrina. And that Demi Lovato was on that Camp Rock movie. And honestly, I don't understand their songs! That Burnin' Up song by the Jonas Brothers sounds a lot like Makes Me Wonder. And this new song by that Demi Lovato sounds a lot like the Jonas' SOS.

And High School Musical 3 is coming to theatres. Great. Somebody needs to round up all these Disney stars (except for Lindsay and Raven and Hilary Duff, even though I hate her, and maybe Ashley Tisdale) and like, lock them inside a window-less and soundproof room forever. That would do the world a huge favour.

ANTM: XXI

ANTM is starting soon, so they've already released the 14 chicks (and dudes). Apparently, there's some speculation that one of them is a tranny. No kidding. Apparently she was on this documentary about transgendered youths. So now having a penis is like, being plus-sized. Plus-genitaled. Fierce!

NIKEYSHIA

Surprisingly, she's not the tranny, even though she could fit right in a film remake of The Crying Game. Seriously... She makes Dominique look like a woman. And something about her pose makes her so unflattering. Her shoulders could cut glass.

MARJORIE

Umm.. Ew.. Doesn't she look like she should be in those black and white satirical films. Kind of like, Charlie Chaplin's girlfriend.

SHARAUN

She's totally normal-looking. Meh.

LAUREN BRIE

She looks like, Melora Hardin, Michael's girlfriend, but with a bigger forehead. She could be half-alien.

SAMANTHA

Once again, meh.

SHEENA

An Asian girl! I wonder what insecurity she has? Or maybe somebody's gonna say "My best friend is Asian!" And she looks like Sandra Oh.

BRITTANY

Eh I think she's OK.

ISIS

The tranny!!!! Supposedly. She actually supposedly appeared on the previous cycle during the homeless photoshoot. But I don't know, she looks so different. But she actually doesn't look that manly here.

HANNAH

Looks like Heather. So yay!

McKEY

Kinda looks like Jenah

JOSLYN

She kind of looks like a cross between Anchal and Anya

CLARK

Even though she doesn't look weird, she's actually really pretty

ELINA

She looks a bit like Bree

ANALEIGH

My favourite!!!! She's actually really pretty and modelesque too!!! Hope she wins!!! YAY!!!

OK I'm off.

Who Will Save Your Soul

Thank God last week was over. I thought I'd be dead, but hey! I'm still alive. On the other hand, Bernie Mac isn't. Remember his show? Where he was kind of mean to his nephews and nieces.

I was supposed to sit my ass down and study the whole day. Woke up late. Watched Olympics. Like, seriously. It's so unfair that when the Olympics end, my exams are start. Anyway, I was watching the women's cycling road race and it lasted for like, 3 freaking hours! But anyway, it was on HD, so I was just looking at the scenery. And man, they were inches from one another. I mean, if somebody were to fall, the whole group would crash.

I don't understand boxing. Apparently, there's this white area on your gloves and you're supposed to make it touch the person's helmet. How the hell do the judges see it? And fencing is also weird.

Anyway, just realised that the latest episode of Project Runway was already uploaded on Youtube. Seriously, this season's crop sucks eggs! I'm sick of more than half of them! They actually eliminated the Katy Perry doppelganger, who was kind of my favourite just because she looked like Katy Perry. And then they had this faux-bitchy move about this guy who was mad at another guy because he rethreaded the machine he was about to use. Yawn. Hakim thinks that Suede is an ass for speaking in third-person. Like, you're 39! Even when he's appearing in the background not speaking, I just feel like punching him. I think it's the hair. Furthermore, I still don't have a favourite. And apparently, East African refugees are the in thing for reality shows.

And what bugged me the most was they had to design for the Olympics Opening Ceremony where the athletes march on the track. And half of them seem to be designing for skinny people. Like, hello?! There are athletes who are humungous who weightlift and stuff. People like Amelie Mauresmo will look fugly in an off-shoulder top!

Speaking of the Olympics, why is a China person carrying our flag?

I'm such a fucking baby.

PS: ANTM IS COMING ON SEPTEMBER 3rd!!!! YAY!!!!!!

Yay! Just like Suede, I feel like punching Ms J. Hey! An Asian girl, and probably an Indian girl sitting down. But then again, these pre-show photos are amazingly air-brushed.

True Lies

No school for me today! Yay!

18 more days to exams. Bring it! I'm ready! Ok it's because I actually have only 3 papers. Heeheehee, unlike the Biotech peeps who have 5. I know, right? But then again, there's still a HTech test during the study week. I am totally going to sit my ass down and study until the end of the papers. Yay!

Anyway, watched this new show on Star World called The Moment Of Truth. It is the most stupidest game show ever. I mean, all you have to do is just answer 21 questions truthfully, but the huge catch is that they were actually asked beforehand more than 21 questions, and only 21 questions are chosen to be asked on the stage. So it's so obvious that the producers would chose a question he lied about to be asked on stage, which means that he's obviously not gonna win the grand prize.

And really, they're asked really personal questions about their lives. It's practically public prostitution of dignity. So it's kind of like, a game show for people who are not smarter than a 5th grader.

SATURDAY!!!!!!!!!!!

And we have HD5!!!!!!

Still haven't missed a single lecture. I should be rewarded or something. And last year I would constantly talk during the lecture. But now I either pay attention or just stone.

I'm not stupid. I'm dumb.

Oh... It's finally OVER!!! It wasn't so bad, was it?

And Migrate!!!! I love surround sound!!!!

Deus Ex Machina

Haha I was reading Perez and apparently, two random not-so-famous people got into a fight at some random airport. Apparently, it's Nikki Blonsky, the fatty from Hairspray and Bianca from ANTM 9. I know... RANDOM!!! Like, the only similarity they have is that they were from a movie/show that prominently features men in drag (John Travolta and Tyrone respectively). The funny thing is that that Nikki girl and her father got arrested or something for beating Bianca up or something. Heeheehee. Whatever. I don't really like either of them.

Anyway, just finished watching the MILF Island episode of 30 Rock. Ok, firstly, they freaking censored 'MILF', so the storyline was compromised because of that!

Urgh! I am going to hate tomorrow! It's gonna be the suckiest and most embarrassing moments in my entire life!

Supposed Former

Heeheehee.



The funny scene of Liz!!!! Act it out on a rainy day!

10.20 pm: [Liz has a glass of wine while talking on the phone] Hey, it's Liz Lemon. This message is for the Co-op board, I guess... This is the number you gave me so I hope it's not fake. Because, you accepted my bid and I haven't heard from you. But I'm doing great! I bought a German television studio today.

10.55 pm: [Liz has a glass full of wine] Does everyone know you're just a bunch of liars or should I tell them myself because I know a lot of people!

11.14 pm: [Liz pours wine into a glass] You know what? I'm fine. Because I know who I am. You. I feel sorry for you, Co-op Board.

12.01 am: [Liz lies on the bathroom floor with an empty bottle of wine] I AM GOING TO THE HOSPITAL, AND I HOPE YOU'RE HAPPY!

12.03 am: [Liz opens up a new bottle of wine] I'm just... confused... It seems weird that you'd still be advertising the apartment after you've accepted my offer.

2.15 am: [uses wine bottle as microphone] ...and I'm here! To remind you!

7.00 am: [runs on treadmill with a glass of wine in hand] You know what? I've moved on. I bought a whole bunch of apartments. I bought a black apartment.

Hahaha!! And these are the messages she sends to the board! Heheeheee!!! And the most hilarious part is that at 12.01, she's all crazy and stuff, and two minutes later, she's back to normal. LOVE IT!!!

I finally have a new phone! Yay!

Glenn Close is getting creepier.